The Big Negative

Is it just me or sometimes do you feel that people are not living in the actual world whist online. I'm not a bore bag, I think it can be fun sometimes to tune out from realities and enjoy the fantasy of the online bubble. At the same time I see less and less people have an opinion about, well anything, it's like being neutral is a new online trend I'm not aware of. I would say I'm sorry but I'm really not, I like standing up and having a say on things. It doesn't mean everyone has to agree or think as I do. Opinion's divided people I get that, and some how have this stained sense of being a negative thing. While I agree that some opinions are damaging and non constructive, at least even blindly that person has a voice.



Maybe it's a blogging thing, a twitter thing or just the policing of social media now but I see less and less people voice any kind of feeling about whats going on around them. My thoughts are that maybe people assume that being a little more outspoken, makes you a nasty person, an attention seeker or many of the other tags and labels that are usually thrown around on the interweb. It can blow up perhaps from a constructive objective thought to just being a troll. Saying that, again it's the opinion to negative ratio. I feel like screaming, okay maybe not screaming that would be a tad dramatic. The only way I can describe it, is like being in a restaurant and for them to not be able to tell you whats on the menu! Do you wait around to find out if they are every going to tell you anything, or just leave. Of course it doesn't make you any better or worst than anyone else, but I do feel like that it can change how I feel about someone. I like debate and thinkers, people who are not afraid to speak. 

Maybe the label of troll is too easily slapped around too, I mean who wants any thought or feeling being twisted and turned into being labeled with that. Twitter I'm looking at you, think before you tweet I think is the best advice. Tweet and delete, nope not a chance with the power of the screen shot. It will float around like someone trying to run away from their own fart. Maybe that's why, being haunted by something you have said may seem like a online fail you can't bounce back from. I once sent a ranted tweet about a parody account which I had briefly mistaken for being a real one, I faced it and all the mocking that followed, laughed and moved on. It's human to mess up sometimes.

What gets under my skin I guess, when someone just brushes over everything I can not understand, the only time some seem to jump on the bandwagon of 'their' view is if literally EVERYONE is talking about it. It seems that positive is best to jump on and negative is to be blanked out as much as possible.  Only for said people to talk about how much support they have bla bla about whatever which they are most certainly clueless about. Blind support without an opinion, is that even possible.  I guess this is the fakeness to some people online, they have so much to say while all the time saying nothing. In some bloggers cases maybe it's to not put brands off them, which is sad. If a brand didn't want to work with me because I'm outspoken or voice about things I feel passionately about, well I'll just give up blogging than shall I. 

Really.

I have a voice and I will us it, I'm not setting out to hurt or disrespect others but to give my view. As one of the old school bloggers, I still remember blogging before any gifting, events etc.. I'm grateful that we have this now don't get me wrong it's awesome.  But I'm not going to sell out my voice for anything, I won't stay on mute in order not to rock the boat. So maybe I'm a little too opinionated I'll put my hands up to that now, I understand that some are just painfully shy. I guess it's understanding that having your say is not about having all the attention and being melodramatic, it's about knowing your view is yours and deserves to be heard just as much as anyone else's  * steps off soap box. Okay so all I wanted to say really was don't let anyone make you feel you can't have your say, not a brand, not another blogger, not a magazine, a friend or a stranger. So what do you think, has the internet became a place where if you do say anything your automatically a troll? Why do you think there's a big blank out on voicing views? 

15 comments

  1. Loved this, Law! I'm quite a meek and laidback kinda girl overall (as you know) but funnily enough find my blog and Twitter the perfect platform to be a little more outspoken. I can collate my thoughts a little better and I just love writing them down. Every time I write an opinion sort of blog post, I get passive aggressive replies and similar comments to the lines of 'ugh, why would you think that?', it's a fine line to tread. Personally I still have no issues with writing about what I want and what I think but I try to be mindful of who out there could be reading and how they could interpret it! Xx

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    1. Thanks Michelle this is it! The good old passive aggressive replies, yeah always fun. I think it's knowing that most readers like hearing about your opinion, or they would not read your blog. I like when someone can say oh check this out because it's great, or not keen on it etc.. some bloggers have saved me a fortune in buying rubbish over hyped products and I like reading about different peoples takes on foods, clothing, issues etc.. It lets you know your not alone. xxx

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  2. I love this post! You hit the nail on the head, even though, I will admit that I don't write many 'opinionated' posts. I know I should but whenever I sit down to write, I get tied up in knots and my argument seems less coherent than before.. I would like to think that if I have a strong opinion about something I will write/tweet/shot about it, but I do feel that even negative product reviews get sugar coated.
    I also have learnt to be careful what you tweet, especially when the news stories pop up about someone's mistake or crass joke that goes viral. I am still learning that you still have to be so so careful!

    As you can see, there was no real point to this comment apart from the 1st sentence - I completely agree with you! But as you can see, my point has vanished..!
    ~Hannah xx

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    1. Thanks Hannah, I often see you tweet your opinions so fear not girly your using your voice and always love chatting with you. I'm the same I think I have it and before I can type it out, my brain switches to something else. Twitter can be vile sometimes, because people can take it out of context etc.. at the same time it's a great platform to get ideas, thought and feelings out on.
      I think that some people like to keep things private too which is cool I mean even I have some things I wouldn't rant on about because no one needs to know, but there are some who literally never have anything to say. It's getting that balance. :) xx

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  3. It's so refreshing to read a blog that includes opinion. As much as I love looking at outfit posts, I've been really struggling to find more genuine lifestyle blogs to read. I like to read words, thoughts, opinions - even if that is on your outfit. Just photos don't grab me anymore, but I think people put those posts out because they are scared to say what they really think. I love blogs that give reviews as well as gorgeous pics - tell me why that blusher is good, not just what it looks like on you! Tell me why you love wearing that outfit, don't just tell me where you bought it from! I've fallen foul of it a while back where I was just churning out the same stuff because I thought that's what I should be doing. Then I wrote an opinion article and it went mental! The internet wants to have conversation and I love that. And as someone who works with bloggers and brands, that's actually what they want a lot of the time too so it definitely shouldn't put people off. Let's bring back the real meaning behind 'lifestyle blogs' and hear what people have to say, not just look at their photos!
    Cx
    www.shoppedanddropped.co.uk

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    1. Yes! Yes! and Yes! See you could have written this post far better than me. It's so true, I think you feel connect more to what your reading when there's more to it than just 'jeans are great' hahaha. I read a post last year that made me cry, about a women's new coat to go with her new wig while she was having treatment for cancer. It was a great coat but it had so much more behind it, heaps of others (going through the same) commented that they never knew they would have to change their wardrobe etc because their hair and the old them had gone and they felt like different people. Of course I don't except this from everyone, but like you say I think some are too sacred to put real feels in positive or negative. It keeps people at arms length. I don't think it's just lifestyle bloggers, it's everyone. A foodie blogger made a 'break up' recipe series, which was based around feeling good in herself after her boyfriend dumped her and to stop her from going back to him when he came crawling back. There are some amazing ones, but it seems like it's a very small pool. But yes to all of what you have said! xx

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  4. I am glad you are outspoken because more people need to be in the world but I think it is also about having responsibility to act on your opinions too. I am very opinionated but I also do a lot of social action work all around the world to make a difference because well words just aren't enough.

    For twitter I follow and am followed by a massive range of people so always have a lot of healthy debates :) As for blogging and worrying about brands that's not why I blog. If a brand didn't want to work with me because of my posts on FGM or Domestic abuse then its not a brand I want to work with.

    Keep speaking up

    Xx

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    1. Can I high five your comment please :) Yes that's exactly it, I think it's really important. I mean even magazines bring issues to attention (not always in a great way) but I think it's great to use our space and our voices to make even thee smallest difference. Or be honest with reads about products or whatever, that's why I prefer blogs over magazines because a lot of bloggers will give you a full view even if it was gifted or not etc.. anyway I rant for ages, but thanks for the support sweetie :) x

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  5. Yet another reason why I will forever adore you xx

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  6. I'm not sure I understand exactly what you mean. Could you maybe clarify? I mean, what opinions are style bloggers not writing about? Do you mean about other people, or about politics, or what? Should style bloggers voice opinions on other things? Maybe the reason most don't, is because their blogs are about style, and not politics for example. But maybe I misunderstood what you meant? ~ Vivian

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    1. Thank you for your comment,to be honest I'm not sure how I can make it clearly or clarify, I'm not talking just about style bloggers only. I mean the whole blogging community really. Well of course a style blogger is going to blog about style, that goes without saying but why can't they talk about other subjects. Things do link and effect one another, there are some bloggers who link current issues within fashion, food and beauty posts. Some bloggers post about charities and twitter campaigns trying to make a difference. While most just ignore or pretend to care, or only get involved if it benefits them. This post was mainly about like I wrote at the end " Okay so all I wanted to say really was don't let anyone make you feel you can't have your say, not a brand, not another blogger, not a magazine, a friend or a stranger." I don't know if this helped in any way.

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  7. You make a perfect point here, I just want to hop on your little opinionated bandwagon and ride off into the sunset ;)

    I love a good opinion, I'm rather opinionated myself and in a way I see it as a right of being a fully functioning human being. Even if a persons opinion is different to mine, I don't care, it makes for interesting conversation and it broadens your own views and opinions when you listen to those of others.

    I see what you are saying with blogs being 'happy places', I think a lot of people like that and I don't have anything against it at all. When I first started I wanted mine to be all rainbows and butterflies but then I remembered when I first had a blog. I was a teenager, I was lonely, depressed and I had little hope in life being happy or different. Now my life is happier and different yet my problems still remain but I'm positive about them now. So I thought to myself, I can have a blog of roses or I can reach out to that person that is teenage me and let them know they aren't alone. That's what I did and want to do with my blog. A want to have a lifestyle blog of a real life. That isn't to say I think all positive lifestyle blogs are bad, of course not! My opinions make me sound obnoxious at times.

    I get the feeling that when you give your opinion on something then it is automatically assumed that this opinion relates to every possibly scenario, person, event etc etc... when really my opinions, like on blogging, are most my opinions about my own blog and what I want to do. Others can do as they please.

    Such a nice thought provoking post :)

    What's life without a little boat rocking ;)

    ~ K

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  8. I'll just add here what Brett Easton Ellis said to Vice magazine recently:

    "VICE: Why have you termed me and my contemporaries "Generation Wuss"?
    Bret Easton Ellis: You have to understand that I’m coming to these things as a member of the most pessimistic and ironic generation that has ever roamed the earth. When I hear millennials getting hurt by "cyber bullying", or it being a gateway to suicide, it’s difficult for me to process. A little less so for my boyfriend, who happens to be a millennial of that age, but even he somewhat agrees with the sensitivity of Generation Wuss. It’s very difficult for them to take criticism, and because of that a lot of the content produced is kind of shitty. And when someone is criticised for their content, they seem to collapse, or the person criticising them is called a hater, a contrarian, a troll.

    In a way it’s down to the generation that raised them, who cocooned them in praise – four stars for showing up, you know? But eventually everyone has to hit the dark side of life; someone doesn’t like you, someone doesn’t like your work, someone doesn’t love you back… people die. What we have is a generation who are super-confident and super-positive about things, but when the least bit of darkness enters their lives, they’re paralysed."

    http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/bret-easton-ellis-interview

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  9. Hmmm it's a tough one. I for one definitely know my own mind and I'm not scared to voice my opinion to someone's face, but on the internet...? Sometimes I feel like you're opening yourself up for attack. On the internet there's more chance of a backlash and more people to dish out the lashings, so to speak. If I feel strongly about something I speak to my friends about it for a more constructive debate. I often see people take a constructive criticism as a negative and not handle it well but you're right...We have a voice, we should use it.

    Really really enjoyed this post. It's given me a lot to think about. x

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Thank you for your comments, I really do love hearing from you x

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