2017| What To Remember When Your Years Been 'Meh'

              Causally throwing in my Instagram photos, because Instagram ( @law1sfab ) hate us all and we have to remind ourselves it still exists.

I've felt flat this year, not going to lie. While it feels that everyone is getting their shit together, I feel like I've taken steps backwards. I think it's easy to feel that you should be ticking boxes off every month. While living your best life sounds simple on paper, it's actual pretty draining trying to work hard, play hard and really enjoy it like that's the whole point right. It's easy to feel you pour yourself into work, and no one cares if your there or not be it in blogging, retail, office or even with your own business . Not having money or energy to play at all, just adds in to the cycle of feeling rubbish. Maybe you have lose a job, and that can bring your once vibrant life to a stand still. 

So where are the positives, where is the sliver lining. while I don't feel I've knocked it out the park this year, I'm not going to pretend that 2017 was a 'meh' year. Because while everyone was off living their best lives, I thought but that's not your life. It got me thinking more into my personal growth, and while to an outsider I may have achieved nothing I've made some huge changes that have started to impact my life for the better. 

Learning to love yourself is the biggest achievement of them all-

Okay so if you have read my blog for a while, you will be aware I have Body Dysmorphic disorder. If not Hello I'm Law, and my brain tells me to hate myself and causes me anxiety and depression, I know fun right. But looking around and reading others posts, watching videos on You Tube it seems a lot of you struggle with the big L word when it comes to yourself. This year I think I've tried to stop my nagging doubts, reminded myself that if I'm happy in my skin that's all that matters. This year I have spent less time in mirrors, worrying that an outfit doesn't look right. My bed has not been filled with my wardrobe because I've had a melt down so badly I can't leave the house. I've confidently left the house without makeup, as someone who's main trigger is my acne skin this for me was huge. It's taken time, I've had to remind myself daily that I'm me and I'm worth loving.  

Maybe you wore something you never thought you would this year, maybe you looked in the mirror and smiled. Maybe you spent more time out with people, then feeling that you weren't worth their time. You may have had bad days, but maybe this year your good days out weighted the bad in a long time. Maybe you felt proud of something, that usually you wouldn't have acknowledged before. If your at the start of this journey then make 2018 the year you give yourself a break, and embrace who you are. Because having confidence in yourself and not needing others approval is priceless. 

You don't need to earn me time -

This is one of thee biggest changes I'm still making, and it's not just because I'm a parent is having time for myself is SO important, and I do not have to earn it. When you think about it, like really think about it why should I have to complete days worth of tasks to have an hour of doing something fun. I think it's so easy to feel like your not doing enough, and that you have to ram every second with something 'productive'. When in reality your half doing jobs because your fed up. 

So while we all have stuff that has to get done, take some time for you. Be it a fancier lunch if your having a crap day at work, doing something creative if crafting brings you joy. Maybe going for a walk if you have been glued to a screen all week. The list goes on, just think about what makes you feel good and just do it. No I'll just do these 50 other tasks first. It's your life and you don't have to earn time to just be in this world.

Slow Progress is still progress-

It's only natural to compare, but I've found that sometimes I can be so busy worrying that I'm not doing as much as others I literally stop what I was doing. Personal my progress has been going from a hoarder to minimalist, while I won't be living in a white cube with one pair of shoes I am determined to reduce what I have and love what I have. When I say slow progress I mean slow, so far it's taken almost three years to downsize everything I have. But space is opening up, and I'm able to let go of things I have no love for. I've started to paint again, and feel more creative. 

Maybe your progress is at work, maybe it's saving up for something, maybe it's learning something new. It can be anything, maybe it's dealing with your mental health, or over coming a fear. Whatever you have started it may feel like your going no where, but it doesn't have to be instant. Progress is progress, and you should embrace that your moving forward. If your struggling with it, maybe set yourself a smaller goal. 

It's okay to remove toxic people from your life-

So this won't be for everyone, but I'm sure everyone has that one person who leaves them feeling like crap or drains your metal energy. This is something that took me a life time to learn, and when I think about thee amount of toxic people I had around me in my twenties I what to scream. I think when we think of being a nice person, it means having everyone in your life no matter how they impact upon your day to day. It can be really hard to cut people out, because you love them and believe that they can change and will grow. Sadly in most it's not going to happen, so rather then dancing around your issues, broken trust etc sometimes it's best to part ways. It doesn't have to be in an aggressive way, for me it was a case of removing myself from their lives. I now feel more relaxed, and I don't have the constant nagging that they are going to cause me upset. It may not be easy, but honestly once you have you will notice a massive change. 

Maybe it's someone online, someone who leaves a horrible comment all the time just  block those negative vibes because life hard enough without a complete stranger telling you your not worthy. I've found this year I've engaged less with people hell bent on dragging others down. Rather then argue about nothing, I tend to just put down my phone and remind myself that some people will always be ignorant. So if you have managed to cut out toxic people from you life, then know that your doing right by you. 

These are just some of the things I try to remind myself of, and who knows what 2018 will bring. I hope that we all have a better year, a year filled with time for fun and more excitement. A time were instead of worrying what others are doing, we create are own goals about living YOUR best life. 

Have you had a 'meh' year. What's your reminder to yourself?