A ziggy patch I hand sequinned that I left for months before completing
You are stretching yourself thinner, than a after eight mint shared by two people. Is your 'to do' list, reaching crazy limits of never ever getting done. Then join the club, what do you need, (no not gin) a hobby of course. We have been filling this void for decades, even when we are already exhausted we still can push a little further if fun isa involved. We live in an age, where the world of hobby is not the cringe fest it once was. And hobbies can take may different shape and forms, be it gaming, yoga, cross stitch, archer, dance, you name it and there's a group of people doing it as we speak.
Being busy is the new cool, creating has made a massive comeback. Yes I'm focusing on the crafty side, but that's just what I enjoy. The phrase 'I'm bored' is kinda frown upon in an age where we have the world at our finger tips. But when does a fun filled, stress free time filler became a stressful ball of chaos. When and how can the joy be sucked from something we once adored. I thought I would help expose, these joy sucking vampire problems out and help you refocus and enjoy again. Because let's face it, mostly it's someones comments that can put us off doing what we love.
The - Turn your hobby into a business
How about No! You cooked a meal once, maybe you should go open a restaurant. Yeah go quit your job and pour everything you have into it. If it fails you won't be able to eat or pay rent but like chase that dream right. Honestly the idea is to pour yourself into something, just enjoy it and go with the flow. Not everything has to equal making money, I think the importance of finding yourself, growing and exploring is being pushed aside. Your basically going from your job, to another job. Where's the break, where's time for your brain to shut off from all your worries and just live in those moments.
While yes okay a hobby into a business can be awesome, and it's cool to fully support someone who wants too. But that person has to want it, you have to understand that it's going to be hard work. Like hell go live your dream, you're doing what you love *she types not bitter at all. But people have to stop pushing (I'm guilty of it ' you should open a shop') most of the time a hobby is the escape from all the responsible that comes with work.
At the same time, if someone apprentices your hobby don't be a twat about it. They are supporting you (they don't count as vampires btw), so embrace there words and try not to get hang up on them planning out your life. They mean well, and damn we all need cheerleaders in life. They are a hell of a lot better then my next joy suckers
The - You're doing it wrong (otherwise know as toppers)
Really, I forget my half sunken in vase was being put on display at the Tate next week. But thanks for the heads up. I've found there is nothing worse than someone who offers no actual advice other then to tell you in a pretty 'not to offend you ' but basically I'm going to drag you way that something you're doing for fun is not correct. You will only come across this breed of joy sucker if your attending a group session.
You through a ball wrong, your not being a team player. You didn't glaze the cake properly, your cross stitch dog has a wonky eye. Well you know what! Maybe my real dog has a wonky eye, maybe it's not about a team maybe it's about you and feeling yourself. Maybe you have had a rough day, and came to get lost in another you. I think there's a big different in encouraging someone to do something differently or do better. Than just trying to one up someone, and taking out their crap on you because it makes them feel good.
If possible try to avoid them, if you have no get away maybe dig a little deeper. Get talking about other things, maybe they are having a rough time of it too. It doesn't have to become a therapy session, but maybe they just want your attention. Some people only know how to get this negatively sadly. If it turns out they really are just being a know it all joy sucker, your well with in your rights to give them a look of disgust - If given correctly this should never be a problem again, unless they are the person giving the class. Then it's probably best not too.
As much as I love crochet, I still have breaks from it when it starts stressing me out.
The -Oh I'll come too (who without even trying decided it's rubbish)
Yes we all have this person in our lives, hell half the time we are that person. You know you are too, just own it there's no point denying it. So you both hear about a cool class, they are all like ' we should so do this' your all like ' yeah I'm a grow up, let's do it'. You both pay, and you think this will be something nice to share and do together. Then you roll up, oh and look who isn't there. Oh and look at your phone buzzing with messages. So now the buzz you had, is damped you think what am I even doing here. Did I actual want to do this.
Well firstly people are going to let you down in life, that's just a fact. What you have to ask yourself is, were you excited to be with your friend or do the hobby. If it was for your friend, it probably will feel like a bit of a chore. But stay, found out don't be scared to go it alone and try something different. Even more so if you actual really wanted to discover something new. People have their reasons, for backing out or canceling plans that doesn't always mean they don't want time with you. So rather then be angry and upset, just throw yourself into the moment. Because there's nothing worse then missing out on fun, because it wasn't right for someone else.
As someone who tends to be rubbish with plans, due to depression (because not everyone is thoughtless) we honestly don't mean to be dicks and leave you on your own. My tip is when it comes to workshops, and other classes be selfish. Go for you, if friends, family want to join it's a bonus but don't miss out because others decided it was not for them or rubbish. Honestly even if you struggle with social anxiety, it actual gets easier the more you do it. Take it from me, sometimes this is why it's worth doing because it's about having fun and often about pushing out of your comfort zone. If you utterly hate it and it's just too much or not right for you. Then stop, you shouldn't have to endure anything remember this is about 'you' time.
The - I'm no good (oh hey inner self doubt)
Okay so let's be real, sometimes it has nothing to do with anyone else. Sometimes, it's the perfection monster that ruins our fun. This is the hardest vampire to tackle, but it can be done. When it comes to hobbies, it's really important to remember why your doing it, why you started it. Hobbies are not about everyone else, they are about you. Doing what you like or love. So when your inner vamp, comes a knocking with 'oh no look how rubbish this looks' or 'oh they are doing so much better than me'. then take a deep breath and remember this is all about you.
Not about them, in any shape or form. If your hobby makes you happy, then embrace it. If you find it's leaving you stressed let it go. It's not a competition, there's no grand prize it's about discovering who you are and what you can do. Also know that it's fine to have time out, it doesn't mean it has to be forever. But know that what your doing or creating, is important because it's by you for you. You may also find that your hobby opens a whole community of amazing people, people who will inspire you and encourage you. But again it's your choice how much you do, when you do. So if your hobby is starting to feel like a chore, the only question really is does this matter to you.
Hobby Is It Worth It checklist -Ask Yourself
Do you have any hobbies, do they sometimes feel like chores. Spotted any of these vamps lately. If so I'd love to hear if you have any tips, or if you simple need a good moan.
Yes we all have this person in our lives, hell half the time we are that person. You know you are too, just own it there's no point denying it. So you both hear about a cool class, they are all like ' we should so do this' your all like ' yeah I'm a grow up, let's do it'. You both pay, and you think this will be something nice to share and do together. Then you roll up, oh and look who isn't there. Oh and look at your phone buzzing with messages. So now the buzz you had, is damped you think what am I even doing here. Did I actual want to do this.
Well firstly people are going to let you down in life, that's just a fact. What you have to ask yourself is, were you excited to be with your friend or do the hobby. If it was for your friend, it probably will feel like a bit of a chore. But stay, found out don't be scared to go it alone and try something different. Even more so if you actual really wanted to discover something new. People have their reasons, for backing out or canceling plans that doesn't always mean they don't want time with you. So rather then be angry and upset, just throw yourself into the moment. Because there's nothing worse then missing out on fun, because it wasn't right for someone else.
As someone who tends to be rubbish with plans, due to depression (because not everyone is thoughtless) we honestly don't mean to be dicks and leave you on your own. My tip is when it comes to workshops, and other classes be selfish. Go for you, if friends, family want to join it's a bonus but don't miss out because others decided it was not for them or rubbish. Honestly even if you struggle with social anxiety, it actual gets easier the more you do it. Take it from me, sometimes this is why it's worth doing because it's about having fun and often about pushing out of your comfort zone. If you utterly hate it and it's just too much or not right for you. Then stop, you shouldn't have to endure anything remember this is about 'you' time.
The - I'm no good (oh hey inner self doubt)
Okay so let's be real, sometimes it has nothing to do with anyone else. Sometimes, it's the perfection monster that ruins our fun. This is the hardest vampire to tackle, but it can be done. When it comes to hobbies, it's really important to remember why your doing it, why you started it. Hobbies are not about everyone else, they are about you. Doing what you like or love. So when your inner vamp, comes a knocking with 'oh no look how rubbish this looks' or 'oh they are doing so much better than me'. then take a deep breath and remember this is all about you.
Not about them, in any shape or form. If your hobby makes you happy, then embrace it. If you find it's leaving you stressed let it go. It's not a competition, there's no grand prize it's about discovering who you are and what you can do. Also know that it's fine to have time out, it doesn't mean it has to be forever. But know that what your doing or creating, is important because it's by you for you. You may also find that your hobby opens a whole community of amazing people, people who will inspire you and encourage you. But again it's your choice how much you do, when you do. So if your hobby is starting to feel like a chore, the only question really is does this matter to you.
Hobby Is It Worth It checklist -Ask Yourself
- Is this actual fun
- Do I feel less stressed after
- Does this cost a lot - If you answered yes go back to the first point
- How much of my time is this taking up
- Does this ever push me out of my comfort zone
- Did it start off fun but now I'm bored
- How much traveling is involved
- Does this leave me feeling down on myself
- Does this make ME happy
Do you have any hobbies, do they sometimes feel like chores. Spotted any of these vamps lately. If so I'd love to hear if you have any tips, or if you simple need a good moan.
You pretty much described the trials that everyone seems to face. A lack of confidence, or motivation, or the will to endure. Impressive observation.
ReplyDeleteMy hobbies don't become chores however, I never focus. My attention wanders so end up taking too much time to do such simple things.
I need order.