I May Wear Rainbows #mentalhealthawarenessmonth

I feel like I'm constantly playing catch up at the moment, I have so much I want to do but there's always something that I've forgotten. So fun gets pushed aside for things that have to be done, energy levels drop and the overwhelming 'meh' levels get me thinking what's the point. I push and push, I forget that I need to wash my hair, I forget that I've missed a meal. I don't sleep for nights on end, because I'm thinking about what I need to get done. 

I want to fill my days and be productive, but my anxiety is getting the better of me which makes even the smallest of tasks hard. I can already see that I'm getting sucked into things to distract my mind, from the constant over thinking. So I decided that I was in need of some self care and me time, Barry has been really supportive and took the boys out so I could have a day to go do what I wanted. I looked at piles of washing, and usually my mum guilt tells me get everything done than you can have fun. I decided that today she was going to shut up and take a seat. It was so nice to go out shopping, it's been forever were I've had the day to myself. I got up had a lovely bath, took my time getting ready and kept reminding myself that there was no rush today.

Cardigan: Primark

Rainbow Jumper: Unif

Jeans: Very

Pink Boots: Doc Martin via Cloggs*

Rainbow Bag: Skinny Dip

I went over Oxford street, as it had been forever and of course headed into Monki. They have such nice things, and if I had the money I would have walked out with half the shop. 

I treated myself to a top, and tried to ignore my ' you don't deserve that ' nagging voice as it was literally £6 and rainbow so there was no way I was leaving without it. I always went to Flying tiger and picked up a game for the boys, and a rainbow hose holder that I'm going to use for my bags instead. I had such a lovely day that I've felt a lot more lifted, and while I'm still struggling everything is a little easier. I wanted to share this with you as it's #mentalhealthawarenessmonth , we all go through struggles with our mental health and we should be able to talk about them without shame. 

I have body dysmorphic disorder, and no matter what I do that's never going to change. So often bloggers share the positive which is great, but no amount of positive thinking will every cure me. It's okay to not be okay, it's important to make time for self care no matter how big or small. But above all know that you're not alone, as hard as it can be talk to someone. They may not always get it, but opening up is a massive step. I'm open about my BDD, because not a lot of people even know what it is. It also helps correct misinformation. There is a heap of myths that surround most mental health issues and some are very damaging to those living with them. I would say if someone you know has a mental health issue, than please I beg you take the time to listen and support them. 

Not by telling them to think positive, not by comparing them with others. Give them your time, give them your shoulder to cry on. Encourage them to come out of the house, even for a hour. Bring them some treats a film to watch, some chocolates. You can't fix people, but you can help them fight against the dark tide. Fighting alone is draining, scary and can leave someone feeling worthless. But having someone who will support you is priceless. I may wear rainbows, I may smile and I may look like I don't have a care in the world. The truth is you can't know just by looking at someone, if they have a mental health issues. 

So let's talk, lets support and lets fight together. Do you have a mental health issue? What would you like people to do more? What are things that don't help you? I would love it if you shared your side. I have a guide on ways to cope with BDD here.